If we are to encourage engagement and ownership not buy-in then we must stop trying to do things to each other.
So many of the problems that we face in our organizations and society revolve around the fact that we are always trying to do things to each other - to change or manipulate them.
I wrote this post on Stop doing things to each other some years ago and have incorporated it into my blook on Conversational Leadership.
The embedded video of me talking about the topic must have been made over 10 years ago.